Carli's Latest Blog Entry
On Sunday, my Little Sister told me her and Mama were going to dinner. I self-invited. Much to my horror, I discovered we were going to a buffet. I said why don’t we try the Asian restaurant instead? Nope, everybody wanted the free buffet with the coupon. I kind of freaked out. I text my Special Friend telling him I was scared. He likes to eat too; he understood and said he was scared for me. When the hostess asked what I wanted to drink I just said diet soda. Even though I don’t drink soda, I was just thinking about not drinking my calories/points. My mom ordered unsweetened tea, I always forget about tea. I ordered a tea as well and sweetened it with Splenda. I had a light breakfast that morning and 20 bonus points left in the week. I couldn’t do too much damage? Right?
I got little bits of everything but mostly meat and veggies. I ate a few spoonful’s of each dish and then scraped it all into one plate. I actually did it, I wasn’t stuffed to the point of being miserable and ate proportionately. But, it’s still hard for me to waste food. I grew up in the clean plate club. You couldn’t get up until you ate all of your food. Still to this day, I rarely leave anything on my plate unless I just didn’t like the way it tasted. But that day, I threw away good tasting food. It feels so wasteful, it’s probably people starving blocks away, and we pick over it and throw it in the trash.
Anyway, it was time for dessert. I figured my “get everything and eat a few bites” philosophy worked well with dinner, it should also work with desserts. WRONG! I got apple cheesecake, strawberry short cake, and 2 flavors of gelato Italian ice cream. It was all displayed so beautifully and tasted just as good as it looked. I started with a few bites but ultimately ate ALL of it. Me and my sister felt like pigs afterward. Lesson learned, if I have to get a dessert, just get one. After dinner we went home and worked out, hoping to balance things out. I’d probably have to work out for 8 hours to burn off all of that food.
The next day was my Weight watcher weigh-in. I took off my heavy sweater and exchanged it for the thinnest t-shirt I could find. This was the first time I was actually nervous about the scale, even though the whole week was great prior to the buffet. On Saturday, my scale at home said I’d lost 3 pounds. I stepped up at the meeting and lost .8 (eight tenths) of a pound. I almost felt bad for a minute, knowing that I had really done much better before the buffet debacle. But then I realized that’s almost a whole pound and I’ve consistently lost weight for 4 weeks. I literally haven’t done that in years. I lost 8.4 pound in January, and I’m no longer bursting out of my pants. They actually fasten now. That’s what I call success and a lesson learned.
I’ve been doing a really great job staying on the weight watchers plan for the last month. It’s really a mind over matter thing, but sometimes I lose my mind and forget I’m on plan. On Friday afternoon they sent out one of those dreaded food emails, detailing whatever free treats are in the office kitchen. This particular day it was chicken wraps. How bad could a chicken wrap be? It could be my afternoon snack. I hurried over to the kitchen eager to get one before they were gone, completely ignoring the fact that I wasn’t really even hungry. They looked good, so I got two. Prize in hand on the way back to my desk I saw the left over brownies from the same meeting at another secretary’s desk. Yummy free brownies, how dare she not include that in that in the email? Free dessert always tastes better. I got two brownies as well. Then it hit me as I looked down at the two handfuls of food hidden in the paper towel, so no one would see how much I really got. I’m a weight watcher now, trying to get healthy, I don’t eat like this anymore. I no longer hide food and mindlessly eat because it’s free or because it tastes good. I put one of the brownies back.
When I got back to my desk I started eating the chicken wrap which was very difficult with my new braces on my teeth. I threw the other wrap in the trash. But there, are starving kids in Africa, that’s wasteful right? Well, I’ll say a prayer for them and release the guilt of throwing away food. Well maybe I can take it home and give it somebody I thought. But in reality, my family would look at me like I was crazy if I brought over a half of a chicken wrap left over from a meeting at work. Now, for that nasty little brownie situation. I pulled up my WW e-tools online that I use to track my food points. I had pretty healthy day, and there was some wiggle room. I tracked the brownie, ate the brownie and enjoyed it.
As I walked in the door at home after work, one of my friends text me, saying “congrats on your weight loss.” I was hungry and just wanted to eat, and didn’t care what I ate. I was probably feeling this insane “hunger” because of the sugary brownie messing with my blood sugar. I made a quick pot of chili and starting filling up a monstrous sized bowl. “I don’t care,” I said out loud, “I’m hungry, I’ll eat how much I want” Right in that moment I heard myself. “Of course you care, you even have friends that care” I reminded myself. I put half of the chili back and counted my crackers according to the serving size on the box. I went to my laptop and pulled up my e-tools as I ate, tracking everything. Friday taught me an important lesson. Sometimes, along this journey, I will have moments that I temporarily lose my mind and revert back to old mindsets, but taking just a few seconds to re-assess the situation can make things back the way they should be.
I’ve got exciting news! First, I’m so super excited that Me and my Big Little Sister are going to Houston, Texas next month for vacation. We have friends and family there, and I’m going to go to Lakewood Church. Do you know what Lakewood church is? It’s the biggest church in the whole country. And, do you know who the pastor is? JOEL OSTEEN! If you read my blog then you know I’m like a Joel Osteen groupie. Okay, maybe “groupie” is bad choice of words, I don’t want to go back stage and….ummm well…let me stop while I’m still ahead lol…. Let’s just say I’m a super fan, yeah that sounds better. On so many occasions Pastor Joel has brought me out of funk and inspired me to be a better person. Even recently, it was his sermon that helped get me through my first week of Weight Watchers. I constantly tell myself all day long, “I weigh what I should weigh, I’m Healthy, I’m Active, I’m Disciplined, I’m Focused and I have what it takes.” My sister thinks I’ll faint before the sermon as soon as I see him and, I probably will.
And in other exciting news I got braces today! Yes I’m a 30-year-old with braces. I had them in college and swore after 2 years of torture that I would always wear my retainer. Well, like most people, I didn’t wear it, and my teeth spread back out. I couldn’t stand to look at them all spaced out anymore. Although over the years, I’ve gotten really good at hiding my teeth when I talk and even better at taking pictures. See Exhibit A, Me and Big Little Sister on Christmas.
I found this cute little cosmetic dentist’s office. The dental assistants cater to you like Hooter’s girls and walk around in high heels with their scrubs. They have flat screen TV’s at every station and fresh-baked cookies on your way out the door. The dentist is young and kinda hot too…I had to ask myself am I really checking him out? Lol I’m sure I’m paying for all of this extra stuff, but they treat you so good! It’s nothing like the kid’s baseball themed orthodontist office I went to years ago. And, get this, the dentist is part of the 6 month smile program. My braces are clear, and they will be off in 3 or 4 months, not years. When I’m all done he’s installing permanent retainers so I don’t ever have to worry about them spacing out again. I’m so excited! Now for the “Before” pic, See Exhibit B, the scary real deal. (I can’t believe I’m posting this.)
Anyway, if you’re wondering about the food and activity side of things, me and my Little Sister danced and sweated with the Kinect last night and I’m down a total of 7.6 pounds just in case you didn’t see my post on my Facebook Page. Man, it feels good to be in control.
I just finished Jennifer Hudson’s new book I Got This: How I Changed My Ways and Lost What Weighed Me Down. I’m a fan of Jennifer Hudson. I have both of her albums and couldn’t wait to get her new book. I’m totally inspired by her 80 pound weight loss with Weight Watchers. I love that she’s a positive Black role model. But, I kind of have mixed feelings about her book. I read a review on Amazon.com that said that reading the book was like reading her Wikipedia entry, and it was! I hate to say it, but the book almost seems sugar-coated.
I was completely outraged that she did not even mention the horrible murder of her mother, brother and nephew by her sister’s estranged husband. You better believe if my sister’s estranged husband killed my Mama, my other sister and my niece, y’all are going to hear about it. Jennifer simply said, “my Superbowl performance was my first public appearance after my family tragedy” Really JHud? Some readers may not even know what her “family tragedy” was. I’ve never lost people that close to me, so I can’t image how difficult it would be to discuss it, but I would have loved to hear how she was able to overcome such extreme adversity and still remain a positive happy well-balanced person. A part of me wonders if her “brushing over it” is how she coped….Okay, I’ll leave it alone…but that was just not what I expected.
Then she had a whole section on the biomechanics of Weight Watchers and a bunch of statistics. I realize that when the program is great you almost become a spokesperson (as I have) because you’re proud of the way it helped change your life. But, some parts were a little too “Team Weight Watchers.” Okay, enough of the negative, but I had to keep it real.
Finally, her personality started to show in the book. She was raised that curves on a woman were a good thing, and she “never felt self-conscious.” I can believe that, a lot of times in the black community, guys like a “thick” girl. A little extra weight is a bonus. When I picture myself at my goal weight, I’m a size 8 or 10. I have no desire to be a size 2 or 4.
It was interesting to learn that Jennifer was not an emotional eater. She literally didn’t know what healthy food was and how to eat healthy portion sizes. She lost weight solely for health reasons, not because of how she looked. She was also inspired by the birth of her son and a career field that thrives on image. That was an interesting perspective.
She mentioned some good food ideas I can’t wait to try like apples and cashews that taste like a caramel apple and how cinnamon on salmon with lemon is delicious. She even included a few recipes at the end.
Her WW leader Liz gave her great insight on being active, she told her don’t do exercise that you don’t like and have as many options as possible. She also reminded her that every day is a chance to start over. Since Jennifer lost weight, she inspired many of her family members to join WW and they have lost over 2,000 pounds. I would have to say that my favorite part of the book was near the end. Unlike her easy breezy “track and lose weight” she discussed her struggles with life after losing such a drastic amount of weight and how it changed her image. She discussed how at one point while filming Winnie, she feared she was too thin, and how some fans rejected her instead of supporting her new found health and body. She also explained how she embraces her extra skin and stretch marks as battle scars to show how far she’s come. I’m long way from taking pride in my stretch marks, but it was refreshing to see how to overcome it once you are on the maintenance side of losing.
Overall, I give the book 3 out of 5 stars. I love that she explains the importance of family and how the strength and lessons of her deceased grandmother pulled her through difficult times. I’m so happy that she found her calling through singing and inspiring, and I believe that she’s right where God wants her to be.
Happy MLK day, I heard on the radio that only 3 individuals have a U.S national holiday in their honor, and I’m proud that Dr. King is one of them. Since my firm recognizes the holiday, I was able to sleep in. Once I woke up, I played the xbox Kinect Dance Central 2 video game in my living room. I was trying to master the moves to Trey Songz hit song, “Say Ahhh.” I’m so uncoordinated, I had to take the step by step tutorial. But, it was so much fun, and it showed that I burned between 30 and 50 calories each time I did the choreographed routine. I was pouring sweat, but finally managed to get 4 out of 5 stars. It’s a great way to workout with feeling like I was exercising. You know I’m an over achiever, I’m going to get those 5 stars at some point. lol.
The scale at home has looked promising all week, so I wasn’t concerned about the weigh in at the Weight Watcher meeting tonight. Additionally, like last week, I look and feel better, so I was determined that the scale was not going to change my mood. But it turned out that was not totally true. Getting on the scale at the meeting did change my mood. I went from being at peace, knowing that I worked the program, to being ECSTATIC that I lost a total of 6.6 pounds in just 2 weeks!!! And I ate, y’all. I didn’t starve. I ate all the things I wanted, just not at much. If I keep saying the positive things and keeping track of my points, there’s no telling where this thing might take me. (People Half their Size issue? A weight watcher commercial? A full marathon? lol) Baby Steps…I know…Only time will tell!
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