“Man, Carli what’s going on?” you ask. “You haven’t posted in forever.” The easy answer is I’ve been super busy. The long answer is that my blog is always first in my heart, I love to write and tell stories, and I love to help people reach their fitness goals. But, sometimes my workaholicness (made-up word) gets in the way. I have a great idea for a fitness iPod app. I wanted to look into seeing what it takes to make one, and the guy I talked to started to build it. He built a demo in a week. This app project was on my to do after taxes, after my e-book, after redecorating my living room list. But somehow it jumped it to top of the list, while trying to juggle a vacant rental unit, leaky pipes and old lady tenants that need help opening the freshly painted windows. Oh, and all of this is between helping my mom with her business and my “real job” that takes up 40 hours a week. Did I forget anything? Oh yeah, and trying to date and meet someone new. Which is difficult when I meet guys that say “I broke up with my fiancé last week, but I’m done lying and cheating and ready for a relationship.” ugh … I had to politely tell him I didn’t think we were a good fit. If you’re wondering, I still talk to my Special Friend. We’re cool, but that’s just it. We’re friends. Time to move on.
Amongst all my busy life stuff, I am proud to declare that I’ve been “clean and sober” since I wrote that post nearly a week ago. No soda, no cookies. I’ve had to battle the caffeine withdrawal headaches and one day those 3 for 99 cent fresh baked cookies from McDonalds were calling my name. But, I didn’t give in. And, I didn’t eat any other sweet treat as a substitute. That’s how I am, if I can’t have the cookies, then I don’t want anything else. This further re-affirmed why I cut them out of my diet (again.) I’ve been keeping WW points during the day, and slacking off in the evening. I went to my Weight Watchers meeting but opted not to weigh in. I felt like seeing a higher number might send me to a place I didn’t want to be. I’m trying to detach myself emotionally from the scale, but that day, I knew I wasn’t able to do it. I realized that sometimes we put unnecessary pressure on ourselves. What was the worst thing that could happen? Would everyone laugh at the girl too afraid to weigh in? Or would the meeting leader look at me with shame and disgust?…nope. Nothing happened except she told me she never makes anyone weigh in, and I sat down and enjoyed the meeting. I don’t plan on making a habit out of it not weighing in; but it was nice to take control over the situation. Sometimes you need a break from the scale. Maybe, I didn’t lose weight, (maybe I did) but I had the major non-scale victory of breaking 2 of my most destructive habits.
Last week I felt like giving up on trying to lose weight. I’ll never be thin, I told myself. It’s impossible, I have too much to lose. I always try and I always fail. I missed a WW meeting, I’m doomed. Who am I to have a website about running? I can’t run anymore I’m too fat. Pretty soon, people will start to think I’m a fraud. So, ironically, I logged on to RunningIntoShape.com and read my old posts for inspiration, which is something I rarely do. I wanted to see what all the other people see. I was actually surprised. None of these feelings or struggles were new to me. And many of them actually have solutions! After reading my blog, I feel like I got bit by the running bug and I reminded myself of 5 important lessons that I learned overtime but somehow managed to forget.
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Soda pop aka Liquid Satan is bad! (see the video) I’ve drastically limited my soda intake for the past few years, only having it on rare occasions. But, at my new job, they have free cans of soda in the fridge. What could one soda at lunch hurt? It’s okay to have a caffeine pick me up during the 3 o’clock slump right? I’m not addicted, I just like it right? WRONG! It does hurt my body, my face started to break out and my knees started back hurting. And, yes I did get re-addicted to caffeine. But, the lesson I forgot is that I can break the caffeine soda addiction. It might be an uncomfortable addiction to break, and it will take a few weeks, but it’s possible. I will cut out soda again.
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Cookies are bad for me. I have no control over them. I can never eat just a small amount, I will always want more. There is no other food that causes me to eat so insanely, during and after the sugar rush. But, the lesson I forgot, is that God helps with even the smallest prayers, like “God help me be strong and eliminate cookies from my diet.” I am strong enough to say NO to free cookies, and I’m strong enough to throw them away. I’ve done it before, I can do it again.
- Years ago, I lost 50 pound in 6 months with the Weight Watchers program. Track your food, go to meetings, and get active. It’s not rocket science The lesson I forgot is that, If I’ve done it before, I can do that again too.
4. Running while being overweight is hard, and it forces you to dig deep and discover a strength that you didn’t know you had. I’m a big girl, and that didn’t stop me from running several 5K’s and it didn’t stop me from walking 13 miles under the blazing sun. The Lesson I forgot is, like my fellow juicy girl Tammy says, I might be slow, but I can run races just like everybody else.
5. The last lesson I forgot is that sometimes looking back at your own past success can be more inspiring than anything else.
Unfortunately, I’ve been eating like crap, and grabbing fast food on the run, but I had SO much fun at my studio recording session. I told you earlier in the week that I’m making a new race day podcast for a 5K and 10K run. I hadn’t recorded in so long, I was almost nervous. Thinking, can I really do this? Will anyone even want it? Luckily my producer friend is a perfectionist. He won’t let me create garbage. Sometimes, he said my country St. Louis accent came out and I sounded like Bootsy Collins. He made me re-record every segment until I got it just right. “What’s a-hen-ha-lin?” he asked. “Adrenaline” I grunted back. I was trying really hard not to sound like Daffy Duck or a nerdy fifth grader, and my braces made it that much more difficult to enunciate. Other times he said I sounded “too much like a phone sex operator.”
We’ve been friends for nearly 10 years and joke around all the time. So, as a joke, I took the phone sex operator critique and ran with it. I intentionally made the next segment sound as sexy as an advertisement for a strip club. I usually try to keep my blog PG, but this is too funny not to share… I seductively moaned into the microphone “keep pushing, you’re doing great!” He was totally caught off guard, and we laughed and laughed. “Don’t make me come in there!” he teased.
For the rest of the night, regardless of my tone, everything that was meant to sound encouraging, sounded completely inappropriate. “Wow, you’re really moving” and “Dig Deep” called for major laughs. And, I giggled the whole way through, “How bad do you really want it? You only have 5 more minutes, you can do it!” Finally, 4 hours later, after re-recording some segments over and over, we finished all the voice prompts. Next time we’ll add the music and I’ll be that much closer to releasing my e-book and my new race day podcast. In the mean time, I guess I’ll go apply for a late night phone sex operator side gig! (just kidding 
…maybe.
Sorry things have been so quiet on my blog. I had to unplug. I’m working really hard to get my personal life organized. I have so many ideas and so many business ventures that I want to pursue, but I was getting nowhere fast. I think I can do everything, just not all at the same time. I had to prioritize. Of course the job that pays the bills comes first. My new job is great! It’s such a relaxed environment; some of the ladies actually walk around in house shoes! They wear slippers at a law firm. Some even walk around barefoot. And casual Friday is the best, I feel like a rebel every Friday when I wear jeans to work. For St. Patrick’s day, they closed the office two hours early and treated us to drinks and appetizers at an Irish Pub.
To get organized, I made a list of all of my to-do stuff. Some things I’d rather do like blog and work on my e-book, but some stuff I gotta do like prepare my taxes and work my G.O.O.D (Get out of Debt) plan. Having rental property requires so much freaking paper work. All of my important docs were in random stacks in my spare bedroom. I said to myself, I’m a paralegal I organize docs for other people all day long. The least I could do is organize my own stuff. I bought folders and file bins and every day after work last week, I came home and filed paperwork. I feel so much better without that nagging feeling of knowing it needs to be done. I finished the paper part, and I think I’ll pay my little sister to help put it all on the computer and spreadsheets this week…. I’ve probably bored you with all of my tax filing babble.
But, next on my list is to finish my e-book. I think you will love it. It’s more than half way finished. The book will also come with a special download. I just got a call from the studio, I’ll be recording again on Wednesday. I get excited thinking about it! Well… I’ll just tell you…. I’m creating a new race day podcast for both 5K and 10K. You asked for it and I listened. You know these podcasts take a lot of time, picking music and writing the scripts and producing. My initial goal was to launch everything this month. But, realistically, I’m hoping everything will be ready early May. I’m sure you guys will keep me focused and on my toes.
I had a wild week. I don’t really know an easy way to say it. So, I’ll just say it, one of my tenants was killed, yes killed. Remember the guy that said someone was stealing his loose change while he was a work? It was him! He was shot while leaving a night club, and his family fought over his belongings in the apartment. Somehow, I got caught in the middle, the police were called and it was just DRAMA! Things have settled down for the most part. But, when I woke up Saturday, I was determined to have a sensational Saturday. My favorite blogger Roni always has sensational Sundays, where she does all the laundry and eats healthy, and gets a lot accomplished. I don’t have a husband or kids to feed, so I figure the least I could do was have a productive day. When the internal clock in my mind woke me up at 8 in the morning on Saturday, I actually got up out of bed instead of just rolling over. I made a to-do list, and got to work. I ate a healthy breakfast. I had an omelet with one egg, egg whites, turkey sausage and spinach.
I did 4 loads of laundry (don’t judge me for having that much dirty laundry!) Friday, I bought fresh cabbage at the farmers market, because they were 2 for 95 cents. I was so excited about the great deal. But, once I got home, I thought, what in the heck am I going to do with 2 cabbages? Saturday afternoon, I steamed one cabbage and baby spinach with sliced turkey polish sausage for lunch.
Then, me and Nyah went to Forest park to get in some activity. It was such a nice day, everyone was out with their pets. Nyah loves people, but not dogs. I knew not too many dogs would be on the stairs at the pavilion. So, we walked up the stairs and jogged down. We went up and down and around the fountain for about 40 minutes or so. There were families on picnics and couples doing yoga in the grass. It was so cute, a picture perfect day!
After coming home and getting showered I went to see Eddie Murphy’s new movie, A Thousand Words with my Big Little Sister. It was fun, just what it was supposed to be, simple and entertaining. I learned that when you get up at 8 in the morning, there’s a lot of time to get stuff done.
